You Can't Eat That Shit!

If you cant eat that shit, what are you gonna do with it? Food scraps and indigestible vegetable or meat compounds are a bitch. You paid good money for the whole damed cob of corn but only eat a fraction of its wonderful goodness. Oh well, better just throw that shit away . . .

But wait! There's a better way: COMPOST . . . or Die! (so they say)

Composting uses food scraps and other organic or fibrous materials (see list below) to make soils and fertilizers. Composters mix food waste with organic materials to encourage natural decomposers such as bacteria, fungi, and worms to break the materials down into a product called compost. This greatly improves the structure and nutrient-content of any soil and can now be used for gardens, lawns, and tomatoes. So the food that would have otherwise been sitting in a landfill has been returned to the earth so that more food can grow.

So . . . what? What does this really matter to those without gardens or yards? I buy my food at the store man, what's composting got to do with me? Well, even if your not going to use the compost yourself, there are very important environmental reasons why you should compost with the city.

For most of of our human history (being predominantly dependent on hunting and gathering), the parts of animals and plants which couldn't be digested or used in daily life were simply left on the ground, to naturally decay back into the earth. What wasn't used by man was digested directly back to the earth. Now, however, most food scraps (indeed, most of all of our senseless waste) is thrown into one big toxic pile. We call it, "The Dump". In this hellish place of poisons and toxins, nothing much besides bacterias and other microbes can grow; so all our food waste (and theres so much fucking food waste!) decomposes into dead land. That is, the food particles break down into land far too baron to support any non-microbial life--let alone an environment.

We have broken a precious and beautiful system:

The sun and the earth feed the plants --> the plants feed the animals --> the plants and animals live, die, and decay to feed the earth --> the earth goes on to feed the plants. And so on. (Its the circle of life. And it moves us all).

But we have broken this chain in a major way. The plants and animals we eat almost never get to be recycled into the earth. Even our dead bodies are pumped with preservatives and put into air tight containers, delaying the inevitable and halting the recycling of the elements of life. Bad people, bad, bad people.

Not only is this a disgrace to the earth, the provider of our bodies and all our nutrients and energy, but this is highly inefficient. Can you imagine what it would be like to put all the food waste of an entire city to good use? We could take what we need and use what we don't--as a city--as a people. But how, you ask, can an entire city regulate its food waste and turn it into soil?

Thank god for living in Northern California. It just so happens that here in Berkeley (and all over the Bay) the task is not so impossible. In fact Berkeley has just made it pretty fuckin simple. If you live in a shared house or apartment all you need to do to start composting is to call this number: 510-981-7270. Wait, lets exaggerate this number:

• City Compost of Berkeley: 510-981-7270

By calling this number you will be provided with a compost bin (different sizes according to your composting needs) and will be set up with a weekly pick up skedaddle. Please, please, for the love of god, call this number and start composting!

But what if you live in the dorms and eat in the dining halls? Will you be without composting options and carry the guilt and shame for the destruction of the earth due to no fault of your own? Well . . .

As of 2005, the Cal Dining halls generated 2850 lbs of waste per day, half of which could be composted. For shame. But, thanks to the student collective, Berkeley Worms, 50 tons of the total 400 tons per year were composted. The Berkeley Worms are no longer active, but Cal Dining has continued the composting program. Make sure to look for these composting bins. Please, please, for the love of god, use these bins properly!

The city can compost these items:

-- all fruit -- all vegetables -- all breads -- cereal -- dairy -- meat (including bones) -- coffee grounds -- filters and tea bags -- food-soiled paper including paper towels -- plates -- napkins -- pizza boxes -- and lunch sacks.

The city cannot compost plastics, metals, glass, liquids, or poop. (You can compost your own poop, but will need a good size yard, a good amount of research, and a few years of commitment--oh, and you gotta love your poop.)

For further composting tips, please visit www.stopwaste.org.

Composting is hella righteous, but the best way to reduce needless waste and prevent the impending apocalypse is to REDUCE YOUR CONSUMPTION! Please only buy the foods you will eat and avoid needless packaging. Local organic foods reduce carbon emissions, and eating vegan seriously cuts down food waste (the vegetables it took to feed the chicken whose leg your eating for lunch could have feed you proper nutritious meals for a few days running).

I have only been composting for a few years now, but my awareness of food waste has drastically changed my life. The food I buy, I buy with intention; the food I eat, I eat with intention; and the scraps I cannot eat, I dispose of with intention. If I can keep this up for another few years, most of the cells in my body will be composed of materials digested with intention and awareness. Thats a whole body of good all-American awareness and intention.

Composting is economic, environmentally sound, way logical, spiritual, respectful, sexy, hella cool and might even get you laid.

Please, please, for the love of god, Compost That Shit!